The 5 "Don't"s of Publishing on the Web

Let's face it, with the accessibiliy of the web aspiring authors everywhere have started publishing their stuff on the web in order to garner attention and positive criticism. Unfortunately, there is a dark side to something which lacks any quality control whatsoever. Upon reading some of this stuff, I've compiled a list of 5 "don't"s that I think it would be a good idea to follow fairly religiously.

1) Don't use txt speech. I know phones don't have keyboards and I know it's completely acceptable for you to send a barely coherent message to your mates about the party tonight. However, you have to accept that dropping all the vowels and a fair amount of the consonants drops reading flow to a crawl.

2) Don't forget to use the spell checker. Actually, if you're fairly confident in your spelling abilities, it's fine to forget the spell checker. This "don't" is aimed at those of you who approach spelling as a game of pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey. At least txt speech is fairly universal, but when people have to take wild guesses at what the word might be, it's time to click the little button that that says "ABC" with a tick below it.

3) Don't play nice with your characters. Have you ever been told that doing something you don't want to "build character"? Whether it did or not is a moot point, in your story building character is one of the most important thing you can do. Throw stuff at your characters, force them to fight dragons, escape demons and generally climb their personal Everest. Challenges being overcome is interesting, Bob the Barbarian effortlessly slaying a dozen orcs isn't (some exceptions do apply, but there's a reason why they're called exceptions).

4) Don't make up the plot as you go along. Now, some authors are quite capable of making a story up as they go along, resulting in a thoroughly enjoyable book. But those authors are rare and probably not the best role models. If you don't work it out before you start off then you end up with characters meandering all over the place with no rhyme or reason and the pacing is usually off. Finish that off with loose ends not being tied off and you'll wish you'd listened to this advice.

5) Don't expect writing to be easy. Writing isn't easy, constant writing will result in it becoming less effort over time, but never effortless. If you've ever read an Author's note at the start of a book, you'll know authors take months to write books and that's putting in a good solid day's work. You're going to struggle every now and then and stumble into the infamous writer's block. Don't let that discourage you, if you persevere, one day you'll be creating works of fiction that will transport readers from this world into a world of your making, one that you created with hard work and a certain amount of love.

Young Adult Fantasy

One of the largely untapped sources of decent fantasy lies in the young adult section of the library. Unlike the SF/F section of the library where I usually dwell, the young adult section has pretty much every genre of book all labeled under the catch-all term young adult. I'm not entirely sure what age group young adult is supposed to cover, I'm going to assume it's probably younger than mid-twenties and leave at that.

Young adult books tend to be a little simpler, a little more black and white than the norm in fiction. Moral crises tend to come about due to doing something wrong rather than not being able to do something right. Never the less, there is a certain amount of decent fantasy that is overlooked simply because it's not to be found in the 'old' adult section of the library.

My favourite author in this section is Tamora Pierce, she was one of the authors that really got me into fantasy and even several years later her books haven't lost their charm. My favourite of her books are her Magic Circle series, these revolve around four young mages who struggle to find their place in the world.

Also of note is Terry Pratchett, not only does he write for adults, he also writes for young adults. I recently read his novel Nation, which is an extremely well thoughout novel set in an alternate 1830's to the one commonly written about in history books. It's about life and death and culture and savagery and it's bloody brilliant and like many Terry Pratchett books I have difficulty describing it. Also of note is Pratchett's Tiffany Aching novels, which are set on the discworld and are about a very intelligent young witch who's far more perceptive than would be expected of someone her age, or any age, really.

Finally there's Clive Barker's Abarat. What sets the Abarat books apart are the illustrations, they're somewhat reminiscent of cave drawings while retaining a unique sense of wonder. The stories themselves are engrossing, there are two books out at the moment and the first one, called Abarat, felt a little rough around the edges, perhaps because Barker was still setting the scene but the sequel to Abarat, Abarat: Days of Magic, Nights of War, is a powerful story filled with magic and adventure that's delighted many a reader.

Right, that's enough, now go out and devour my recommended reading. I assure you, you won't regret it. And failing that, if you do regret it, your situation is probably odd enough that it couldn't be planned for, so I won't try. Toodles/

World Building

Have you ever noticed how traditional (think King Arthur) fantasy is often so cliche that the story isn't worth reading, the world of old Europe is so strictly confined that it's all but impossible to make something unique and worth reading. Luckily for us, the majority of modern high fantasy is set in fantastical alternate worlds, largely but not exclusively, based upon old Europe but often with cultures and traditions vastly different from the feudal societies presented in more traditional fantasy.

Possibly the most famous world builder is one Terry Pratchett who is best known for his Discworld series. If you haven't read Terry Pratchett then I suggest you take a visit to your local library. There are currently 36 of 'em and despite this the majority of them are out every time I visit the library which says something for the popularity of them. I understand that Pratchett was recently knighted for services to literature.

The Discworld series is comic-fantasy, set upon the Discworld which is a world in the shape of a circular disc that sits (or rather, rotates) on the back of four enormous elephants who in turn stand on the back of an even more enormous turtle. It's somewhat hard for me to explain the Discworld, with over 36 books it's become somewhat complicated and the writer's skills make it as difficult to explain the Discworld as it would be to explain Earth. Put as simply as I can, Terry Pratchett takes all of today's traditional fantasy elements (magic, vampires, elves, barbarians, gods) and puts them in a world in which the majority of people treat them as just another part of life.

Simon R. Green is another I greatly respect for his world building. His Deathstalker series is something of a parody of the space opera common at the time he started writing them. Green specializes in a somewhat Lovecraftian take on the universe, full of hostile beings and nonbeings who are so alien that they distort the very reality around them and humanity evolving into a somewhat brutal culture in order to just survive. Green departs from Lovecraft in that humanity is equally capable of creating monsters (why is humanity always depicted as being the most innovative species in the universe? Is it just that that's the reason we became dominant on earth?) that are an equal match to such awesome beings.

Finally I'd like to praise Brandon Sanderson for his Mistborn series, despite the fact that the last book has not actually touched my library's shelves since it came out, there's something unsatisfying about a book that has been consistently reserved for the last three or four months. But I appear to have lost the trail of this conversation, the point I wished to make is that the Mistborn series is almost completely unique when compared to all the other fantasy I have read. The Mistborn series is set in a world which has been controlled for a thousand years by the tyrant know as the Lord Ruler, he created the system of the nobles and the slaves known as the Skaa. Since then the entire society has barely changed, the nobles have great balls and the Skaa slave away. The nobles occasionally spawn someone with the ability for allomancy which is something of a cross between magic and psychic ability, there are several abilities of which an allomancer can have either one or all of them. An allomancer with all of these abilities is extremely rare and extremely powerful. The first book revolve around two half-skaa who both have the full range of abilities and who's goal is to overthrow the lord ruler. Not wishing to spoil the the plot, I'll refrain from any more discussion but I suggest you check out the Mistborn series.

I'm afraid I'm not much of a critic, I lack the abilitiy to go on for pages about the author's shear ability to make you want to throw up (because that's a good thing?), but I know what I like and judging by the reactions of fans I think I know what others might like, as well and I think these three series are something you'll enjoy.

Steampunk

Steampunk: What is it? For a detailed look at the genre, I suggest you try wikipedia, for just a precis, however, look no further.

Steampunk is a somewhat broad genre encompassing fantasy, alternate history and even sci-fi in it's attempts to bring the romanticism and feel of the Victorian age into the story. Steampunk also reaches beyond literature and story telling into fashion and even music, however since I don't give much of a damn about the first and nobody understands what steampunk music is, it's probably best if we focused on the story aspect of steampunk.

Some of the main steampunk cliches include steam power (obviously), brass, goggles (steam and bare eyes don't go so well together), Victorian era costume and zeppelins. What makes the genre so fascinating, I suspect, is the sense of exciting discoveries and science that relies on practicalities rather than the understanding of atoms, particles and energy flows.

If you're interested in reading some steampunk (and let's face it, who wouldn't be?), I'd suggest the novel The Court of the Air by Stephen Hunt and the webcomics Girl Genius and FreakAngels.

The Court of the Air is steampunk fantasy in which the two main characters and the large supporting cast try to defend the world from the forces of Carlism (An extreme version of socialism) and the insect gods who desire human sacrifices and to send the world into the dark ages.

Girl Genius is about an alternate history in which people there are people with the ability to make wonderful steam powered robots known as clanks. These people are called sparks and they are born with this ability (presumably, or maybe it's given to them by the ability fairy when it gets bored, either way the ability doesn't come from hard work and perservation) and the main character apparently lacks any such ability at all.

FreakAngels is set a little in the future where a group of people with supernormal abilities protect a small settlement of people. For reasons that become obvious, civilization has suffered from extreme flooding and now raiders try to attack the settlement for the resources that they have and the raiders don't. Also, most of the technology is now steam powered... makes sense, what with all the water around.

In conclusion, steampunk is a broad, fun and somewhat weird amalgamation of old technology and modern strangeness with just a pinch of Victorian sensibilities thrown into the mix. It's hard to tell if you'll like the genre, because it's full of so much variety that there's bound to be something you'll like.

Reasons Why Chick-Lit and Urban Fantasy Probably Shouldn't Be Mixed

Everyone knows what chick-lit is, a book about a woman's obsession with men. If it's not about that, it ain't chick-lit. You can usually spot pure chick-lit by it's cover, something girly set over a pastel background.

And many of you should know what urban fantasy is, fantasy set in a modern environment, an environment far different from high fantasy and it's ilk, set in the ancient days of knights and damsels, nor is it set in the far off future, like science fantasy, which is completely different again (unless you're Star Wars, which still contains knights and damsels). 

Now, chick-lit is usually about a certain kind of character (this is more based off the blurbs on the back, than an actual read-through, I don't read chick-lit, perhaps because I'm not a chick), a twenty something woman who's struggling to meet the demands of her career while simultaneously trying to find the perfect man.

Urban fantasy, on the other hand, tends to be more about the main character (usually, but not exclusively, male) who does his or her best to protect the citizens of whatever city they happen to be in from whatever form of monster or mage that takes the author's fancy.

The obvious combination of these two is a twenty something woman who's looking for the perfect man and fights monsters in her spare time and this is the almost inevitable result of such a merger. The other result is that the perfect man tends not to be a man at all, as such, but rather a member of the supernatural community.

It's my belief that this type of fantasy is the reason for the pop culture image of vampires, who are generally portrayed as supernaturally handsome/beautiful with a tendency to be amazing lovers, perhaps the only reason they drink blood is due to it's requirement for horizontal activities.

Now, perhaps you believe I'm being unfair to the urban fantasy chick lit genre and I will concede that there is the occasional book that is a good read despite itself. Kim Harrison's The Hollows series, although maybe they're the exception the proves the rule.

In the other corner we have the Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter series and the Merry Gentry series by Laurell K. Hamilton and the Dante Valentine series by Lilith Saintcrow. Anita Blake and Dante Valentine are both strong female characters who fight monsters for a living, Anita being the licenced vampire executioner for her area and Dante being a bounty hunter. Both of them wind up falling in love with supernatural monsters and both of them gain supernatural powers due to this.

Granted, the Anita Blake series originally focused a lot more on Anita as a lone agent and judging by my own reaction was a lot more readable to male readers. Unfortunately, Anita gets infected by this thing called the ardeur and has spent every novel since participating in more and more gratuitous sex. I stopped reading several novels after the whole ardeur thing started, but by the time I stopped reading, she'd collected an entire harem of supernatural lovers (Anita claims that she's deeply in love with all of them, but she seems to not have much of a grip on reality anymore, I blame constantly being beaten up by vampires, werewolves and the occasional zombie.)

Dante Valentine doesn't really have much of an excuse for being like she is. Despite being able to deal with pratically anything short of a demon, she's needy and whiny and when she should be acting independent, she's obsessing over a lover. A sorrier excuse for a hero I've never come across and I could wish I hadn't come across her in the first place.

Merry Gentry, being the character I haven't much spoken on, is an elven princess. Unfortunately, like Anita, she's obsessed with sex and all her magic comes from sex. Also like Anita, she has a drooling male harem, presumably because Hamilton wasn't satisfied with living vicariously through Anita. Unlike Anita, however, she doesn't have the excuse of the ardeur and tends to think of sex as pretty much the solution to every problem. 

Oh, I'd also have liked to bring up Twilight by Stephenie Meyer, but I haven't read it and I hope that I never will. Based upon reviews and passages from the book, I can say with some authority that only young teenage girls could possibly find the series entertaining. Then again, that's teen chick-lit urban fantasy and the mixing of that many genres could never turn out well.

In conclusion, if you enjoy chick-lit, that's (not really) fine and if you enjoy urban fantasy, bravo. But for goodness' sake, do not try and mix 'em, because you'll end up with something that's less than the sum of it's parts.